"Yes"

I’m much younger in age than most people would guess.  Maybe it’s because of the way I carry myself? I don’t think that maturity comes with age in my personal opinion.  I think it comes with life experiences and situations that grow you, test and stretch you. I’ve been passionate about the topic of relationships since I was 11 years old. I don’t remember what it was specially that struck that passion, but I do remember looking around my little world and thinking that I wanted nothing to do with how other people did relationships. There was nothing beautiful in what I saw. Nothing pure, nothing sacred. I was surrounded by young people who flirted and played with each other like it was a big game. I didn’t see anything beautiful about it. And I didn’t want to play a game.

When I was 11 I went to a conference for women. At this particular conference one of the sessions was about God written love stories. The speaker shared a bit of her story with the ladies who were listening intently, and something pulled at my heart. Whether it was something she said, or the worship, a desire was planted in my heart that day. A vision unfolded before me. That if the pen is surrendered fully to Jesus Christ, He really can write the most beautiful stories. I didn’t realize that not only my life story but my love story as well didn’t have to be cheapened by the world’s standards.  I didn’t have to look just like the world in the way I went about things.  I knew I wanted a story that was 100%  God orchestrated, and I wanted a story that was beautiful.

There’s something in the feminine heart that desires that, and if we’re honest, I think we all long for it. To be pursued, to be won over.

How can I know that a relationship has the potential to be one of the most beautiful and sacred things we experience if I’ve never been in one before? That’s a valid question. And due to deep hurt some of you have been through, you might just call me silly and far too unrealistic to even think that a relationship could be all that and more. But here’s what I would have to say for myself. I have a relationship with Jesus. I commune and talk with Him every day. I share my struggles with Him, my longings, my dreams, and He so sweetly listens.

And one of the things we talk about often is relationships. HIS heart for them. How He longs to be invited into them, He longs to be the one that orchestrates every detail.  I think where we’ve lost the beauty and sacredness of it is when we started taking it all into our own hands. We’ve pursued what we’ve wanted to pursue because it felt good and fulfilling in the moment. But I think the act of waiting on God, and asking His approval first can change so many things.  It creates a space for Him to dwell and it creates room for Him to work. I’m not against dating, but what I am against is dating without purpose or intention. What I am against is saying yes to an offer or opportunity without even consulting the King of the Universe about it first. Dating because you can isn't valuing the heart that God has given you, nor is it valuing your time.

He knows what’s best for you. What your heart beats for, what He’s created in YOU. We say yes for the sake of saying yes without realizing how much that cheapens things. Your heart has value. Your life has value. Your purpose has value! And that’s not meant to be shared with just anyone that comes along wanting to barge in to the doors of your heart.

I think if we realized that we have value to begin with, it would affect the way we carry ourselves and what we say yes to. We would start to realize how much value our yes has!

I’ve never been in a relationship before. Not because I’ve never been asked, but because I wanted my Heavenly Father’s approval first. And with every offer that has come, He’s not given me the yes from Him.  Now, because I know He has His very best for me, because I know that He knows me better than anyone, His approval is the most important to me.  I have the freedom to say yes to whomever I want! Absolutely. My Heavenly Father isn’t controlling. But because we have a relationship that is centered on trust, that means I’m going to trust that He has something better if I don’t feel Him giving me the go ahead to say yes.

It all comes down to this. He wants to be a part of your love story. He wants to make it beautiful and precious for you! But He’s not going to force you to make Him in charge. He’s not going to force you to put the pen in His hands. You have to make that decision, and let go and trust. That if you’re meant to be with a man, and if you allow Him to be in charge of it, it truly will be more beautiful than you could’ve ever imagined. How do I know? Because I know HIM. And that’s enough for me.  I very much am looking forward to that day when I finally do get to say YES.. That long awaited answer that I have so longed to give, but only with the blessing and approval of my Father. How special it will be.

 I’ve said no to other offers because my Heavenly Father said, “not yet”. Someday when He does give me the permission to say yes, I will know just how much my Jesus loves that man, and how that man must’ve really gone out of his way to seek the permission of my King to pursue me! The right kind of man won’t take seeking God for that lightly. He will see just how precious your heart is and how it ought to be treated that way.

Not every relationship ends in marriage, but that doesn’t mean it’s failed or lost purpose.  Even the ones that don’t end in marriage have every opportunity to have trusting in God be the center of their relationship, and they have every opportunity to reflect Jesus and be orchestrated by Jesus.

It’s all about perspective. Realizing He wants our best for us. Realizing that we aren’t defined by a relationship status, and that if He’s not giving you a peace to say yes, trust that there’s a reason for it. Realizing that when He’s a part of it, it truly is the most beautiful and sacred thing. He can be trusted!

He wants to transform this area of your life! He wants to redeem what has been lost or stolen, and believe me sweet sister, there is nothing that He can’t redeem. 

Love, Rosie

Sir. I Know I Love You

I remember when the idea of your existence first came into my mind.

The idea that somewhere out there in this big wide world, you were living and breathing. 

Just like me, you were growing and learning. 

Through the stumbles, scraped knees and wrong turns, you were being molded and stretched just like me. 

Oh how i love you so. My heart has always been to honor you and bring you into my life before you've ever stepped foot into my heart.

My prayer has always been that when the writing of our stories collide, you would know that the decisions made, words spoken, and actions revealed would show my love for you and desire to honor you, even when I didn't know your name. 

It's easy to wonder, when will I get to say yes after saying no so many times?  When will our steps become in sync and our hearts in tune to the song our Father is singing over you and I?

Even in the unfolding, the separation in our stories, the time ticking, the pages turning, in the present and in the now IS sweet and valuable. The stings, the tears, the hurts, are all mandatory for the calling and direction we are headed towards.  I wouldn't trade this season for anything, even if that meant you could be here in the now.  

My heart has forgotten just how sweet and beautiful a story can be if it's written by our author. And we wouldn't want anyone to take that place, especially not us. So my dear, let us rest. Let us put down the pen, and watch and pray. 

We wait, not in stillness but in expectancy. We wait with intention and direction, not in confusion or impatience. 

Let us rise before sunrise and cherish the colors, or go stargazing and take in every twinkling star. Let's dance our hearts out in the mornings and value every laugh and tear. 

The steps we are taking are directed and guided, even if we can't see what's on the other side.  I can love you in my heart, but also live my life and story to the fullest. Only our Jesus could put this love in my heart for you, for someone I don't even know. Others can call that crazy, silly, useless, but I see it as something beautiful and something to be greatly treasured. Something sacred.

I hope you are doing well in the season Jesus has you in. I hope you are taking every opportunity to be His hands and feet, to speak truth when the truth is silenced. 

I pray you are growing in your heart for justice and to see truth proclaimed to the nations. 

Know that I do not want a life of comfort, as much as my flesh calls out for that. I want a life that will push both you and I to our faces before Jesus. He has not made me frail, but eager for a life lived with intention. 

Where you lead me, I will follow. Not because I know you won't ever make a wrong turn, but because I know who is leading you. Oh how I'm praying for His direction in your life!

I will be here to support you, but also point you to truth when you need it. To be your adventure buddy, singing songs in the car kind of pal, and most of all, your best friend.  Our life will be messy, imperfect, hard, and there will be times where we hurt each other. But in the midst of our mess, may we turn to the one who heals. To the one who will help us always. 

You Sir. are very much cared for. You have someone who has prayed for you for years, and someone who has always wanted to honor you❤️ I know you will so be worth all the waiting and wondering. 

Even if you never even came, my life is perfectly filled with my King. Know that my life isn't on hold for you, and I pray yours isn't on hold for me other. You will never "belong to me" but to Him. You are His and His alone. May you know His love for you. May you chase Him with a perseverance that is unhindered. May you long to know more of His gallant character, and may His word pluck the strings of your heart to the tune of His song. We shall sing a song together, for the whole world to hear.

You have purpose, kind Sir. Live like it. Sing like it. Walk like it. There's no time to waste ❤️

Sincerely, 

Rosie

Love

Have you ever felt lonely in a situation?? Maybe you have been in a season where there didn't seem to be anyone who could understand the pain your heart was going through or a nearby listening ear that wanted to know what was on your heart. It's been hard to process the seasons and change He has been bringing me through, and there are aspects of it that have made me wonder if He's still in control. Parts that have made me feel alone.
Just last week i hit a wall of discouragement. I thought i would've received more direction and clarity regarding an important decision i needed to make. But, instead i didn't hear anything from Him or feel anything. Tears begun to fall from frustration, then out of nowhere i heard Him say, "My Katherine, if i asked you to jump out of a window, and you knew that i was on the ground ready to catch you, would you trust me enough to jump?"
He asked me to answer honestly... and in the depths of my heart i wanted to say that i did. But i told Him i was struggling to see His love for me in the midst of my circumstances and grief.  I told Him that in that moment, i couldn't jump.  You see, pain and grief can make you turn from Him instead of running into His arms of safety.  It can make you turn bitter, hopeless, or lost.  He sees when we struggle and when we can't seem to see Him in our present circumstances. But just like He so faithfully reminded me yesterday, nothing could quench His fierce love for me. Even if i struggle to see who He is, even if i wrestle believing that HE IS GOOD.  He overwhelmed me with His love yesterday. I tell you this to remind you of the hope you have in Him. This season won't last forever.  That there is a light around the corner. His hand is right there for you to grab, and His arms are open for you to crawl into. Keep pressing into truth, into scripture, and worship until your heart is firmly planted on these truths. He is faithful.

xoxox,
Rosie

Yes & No

I remember having this revelation on Valentines Day. I woke up the morning of just like i normally do (surprise!) and i got ready for my day.
I went on a picnic with my two little men (yay for the nanny life) and we shared a lovely picnic on a windy day that ended up blowing our lunch all over the place.
That evening i got together with two dear gal friends, we got dolled up and headed for Downtown to eat at the Cheesecake Factory. On the car ride there, i saw the twinkle lights glistening from the city as i thought to myself, "I really wish that i could share this evening with my man,  but at the same time, my heart is so so content"-
Then i started reflecting on the different situations I've been through, the offers that have come by, and how every time i never had the grace or YES from Jesus to say yes.
I had to say no. Trusting that there was a better yes around the corner.
Then the thought hit me.
I'm still single tonight partly because of me! GASP.
You see, God gives us a choice. We can either take this area of life into our own hands, and confidently say yes to any offer over coffee or dinner because it's fun, adventurous and exciting.
We could jump into any situation that offers itself up, and just say "don't take your life to seriously".  And yes. I've been told that many a times over.

Looking at the different situations that have come my way, i could easily be engaged at this point in my life and possibly getting married soon. I don't say that to boast, or say "look at me" but i say it to give an example of just how differently my life would be looking like right now if i simply said,
 y e s.
It's an easy enough reply isn't it? No, not really... not unless you understand the weight a simple yes can carry. 
If i said yes because my desire for marriage or a guy in my life was so important that it didn't matter what it looked like in order to get there, then how is that inviting Jesus into the process with me if i consult my desires and feelings over what He has for me? Over what He wants for me? I don't want what i want for my life. I want what He wants for my life.
What I'm saying is, that yes,  DOES MATTER.  It matters greatly, and the weight of it should be felt.
It matters what we say yes to, and whom we say yes to, and when we say yes to it. 
I could be on my way to having my five year plans checked off by now.

1.) Get married
 2.) Jump into ministry
3.) Start a family 
4.) Photography business blooming  
etc...etc...etc.... 
 And of course there are many other dreams and aspirations to add, but my list doesn't matter when it comes to the plans HE has for me. It's not worth saying yes to, if i know HIS answer is a no.
My life is His. My heart is His. All things pale in comparison to Him when we get to the point of being so captivated by Him that nothing else matters except following His will for our lives. 

Don't get me wrong. You can be wholeheartedly in love with Jesus and still struggle at times with being single. But it's what we TURN to in those moments of loneliness or heartache that can determine whether we stay in that struggle or not.  

I look at my life, my standards, and i can't help but think that i must look so odd and stiff to some people. But i'm so okay with that. Because I've gotten a taste of how worth it it is to walk a path that may be foreign to some, that may seem ridiculous to most, because every time, i find Jesus on that path waiting to meet me and to take me to new places.  I understand that this is just a perspective, but my desire is for you to gain God's heart for you in this season of singleness. For you to gain His heart when an offer does come, and knowing what He wants you to say when it comes to giving an answer to that offer. What that looks like is between you and Him, but my desire is for you to seek Him yourself, ask Him yourself, and find out what kind of a path He wants you to walk down. It's okay if it looks differently, but the most important part is that you are seeking Him on the matter.
He could be the most dashing man with a gentlemanly character and it still be the wrong thing. We only see with earthly eyes into the present, but our Jesus sees into the spiritual with a heavenly, long term perspective. 
Will you trust Him with your response?
Will you trust Him with your "Yes's and No's"?
K-



 

 

The meeting}

My eyes awaken to a reflection of orange coloring my walls. I roll out of bed, putting a shawl over my shoulders, bare feet running through the freshly wet grass from the morning dew. I sit underneath the big oak tree that has been there since the beginning of my childhood. Before the beat of my heart took place in my story.
Strands of my wild curls frame my face in a wispy, untouched way. Before my eyes,  a scene of beauty is taking place. A representation of the promise. The sun rose, and the sky was painted with beautiful pinks, and arranged the quilt like sky in a colorful, vibrant pattern.
My heart leaped as I heard a whisper to my heart.
My precious King called to meet me. As fresh as the dew in the early dark of the morning, so is His presence to me. Fresh.  I answered His invitation.

My heart stopped.

He is here.

Before the world awakes, He puts on a beautiful show just for me. He woes my heart with His song that He sings over me. I close my eyes. The air representing His breath. His presence. I hug tight to the warm feeling I experience as I tug the shawl tightly around my arms. I'm embraced in the comfort of His love. Forever and always. No striving, no need to impress Him, He just takes me as I am.

He sees past the messy curls, the blemishes on my untouched face.

He whispers in a soft breath,

"Beloved, every morning My mercies are anew. I desire, I long to breath my life into your lungs. To be the beat of your heart. To let your eyes see how much, how deep, and how wide My love is for you. Will you grab My hand? I would like to show you something"

I partake in His invitation. As I grab His strong hand He leads me down a path I've never been down before.  The path was graced with overgrown wildflowers, some as tall as Him.  He eventually led me to a hill that overlooked a lush valley. We stopped, then He looked at me.

"If you choose to follow the path i have for you, the most beautiful treasures will unfold in your life, my Beloved Katherine. My faithfulness has been etched into your life before you were even born. My best for you, is the best of the best. I will never force that on you. My invitation to you is to become a warrior, a princess for my kingdom. To fight the good fight, and to wait for a man who will be willing to fight the fight with you. He can't just be any man, my daughter. He must be equipped, He must be prepared for this calling. Many will try and keep up with you, but only I am capable of equipping the right man to run along side of you. To run even further ahead of you. Do you believe me, that as your Father, i want what's best for you?"

"Yes Daddy, i know you know what's best for me" i said.

He grinned widely. "Then will you let go? let go of all your hopes and dreams and take me as your hope and dream? will you allow me to become your all in all? to fill every bit of your heart to the point where all you are focused on is me?" 

I teared up at the words He was saying. That was the cry of my heart. To fall in love with Him to the point where that was all i focused on.

"oh how i want that.. i want that more than anything!"  i said.

"Give me your heart my beloved. I will never force you to give it to me, but i will always ask for it. let me be your protector. Hand over the situations that have broken you, let me be the guard over your heart. You are my daughter, and I want what I have planned for you to unfold in such a way where you have no doubt I have been in control from the beginning. It may not always make sense. But the most important thing to cling to in those moments is the knowledge that you have of my character. That my plans are to shower my goodness over you. Let me mend the heartache".

I collapsed into His arms. To have someone know me better than anyone ever will was the best comfort I could feel. I looked within my heart to see the times I settled. Oh how I so desperately wanted something to work. I would cling to the thread in the hopes of it forming fabric. But He never was using thread. He was using paint to create a beautiful painting of my life. I was never meant to carry the paintbrush.  Why was it so scary for me to let go sometimes ? why did I battle with remembering that He was all I ever needed? That was when I knew I couldn't carry my heart any longer. It was far to beaten up from my own doubt, from being chased after by things that took advantage of me. I felt like prey, but here my Daddy, my King, was offering to protect me forever. He was promising me that I would always be loved, cared for.

I exhaled deeply. I looked up into His eyes.

"I will give you my heart Daddy. Even when I try and take it back, remind me that it belongs with you. I trust you. You are faithful even when I'm faithless.  I don't know what lays ahead of me. I don't know what struggles or challenges I will have to encounter. I feel unequipped, and even directionless at times. but I know you will be my strength and my source of direction. Here I am, use me in any way you see fit. I'm a broken vessel, but I'm not broken when I'm with you. I'm whole. I'm complete, all because of you"

We both stood, overlooking the valley for quite some time. The breeze was sweet to the taste. I knew it was a small glimpse of what heaven would be like.


My heart was finally in His hands.

There is fruit in the growth}

Hey sweet sister, 
How are you doing? How is your heart? Can i pour you a cup of tea and share with you some things that have been on my heart?

I want to tell you something that i wish i could've told my 15 year old self. There is fruit in the growth God brings you through. How purposeful our King is in every. single. thing.
He doesn't waste a single drop that drips from our lives. He grows and refines us. He sanctifies us into an image that purely reflects HIM and HIM alone. When we draw near to Him, He begins to take self off of the throne of our hearts until He becomes our ruler and King.


This may be a really rough season for you right now. You may feel like you're in a season filled with constant struggling and wrestling. My question to you is this... what are you doing about it? Are you continuing to go back to the hurt that festers and grows every time you ponder it?  Are you going to that guy to fill that aching hole in your heart? What are you feeding yourself?

Have you reached a point where you are so desperate that you search for ANYTHING and EVERYTHING to take away the sting? Sister, in these times you MUST remember who your King is. You must remember to whom you belong to. Yes. i understand that you might've grown up hearing this your whole life, but right HERE and right NOW our Heavenly Daddy wants to make this SO real to you. He wants to bring you to a place where you truly reckon this as truth in your own life.  He has to be the one you run to and cling to in your times of trouble and struggle.
Even if you don't "feel" like it... you have to run to Him despite what your flesh or mind tell you. You have to preach truth to your soul. Scream it on the mountain tops if you have to! You have to preach truth while your crawling through the mud in depths of the valley. Even if it looks like sobbing your eyes out until make it into His arms. His arms are not very far, sweet girl. If you can't walk, He will help you. If you can't move, He will help you. If you feel so broken, He will heal you.

 The Lord is my shepherd, I lack nothing.
²     He makes me lie down in green pastures,
he leads me beside quiet waters,
³     he refreshes my soul.
He guides me along the right paths
    for his name’s sake.
⁴ Even though I walk
    through the darkest valley,
I will fear no evil,
    for you are with me;
your rod and your staff,
    they comfort me.

⁵ You prepare a table before me
    in the presence of my enemies.
You anoint my head with oil;
    my cup overflows.
⁶ Surely your goodness and love will follow me
    all the days of my life,
and I will dwell in the house of the Lord
    forever.

Psalms 23}

You have a choice sister. Right now. What are you going to do? What are you going to feed to yourself? This is a vow He has made to His children. Do you not believe it? Surely HIS goodness and love will follow you ALL the days of your life. Not just certain days, but ALL. Including the heard times. Do you believe He is good?

Seek Him sister. He what we need <3

Rosie}